Saturday, November 15, 2008
sugery : (
When it rains it pours I guess. I went to the obstetrician yesterday and found out that I may need surgery. I was having pain down there all the time almost like having menstrual cramps all month long. And I bleed horribly bad during my period. The doctor checked me out and put me on Naproxen for my pain for now. That medicine makes me so tired. I hate that. Anyway, he said he wants to do an ultrasound next week to make sure I dont have any cysts. After that he wants to schedule me for a D-n-C. Then after that he wants to do something that I have never heard of before. He wants to put me to sleep and put a balloon inside of me and heat it up and burn the lining of my uterus so that I dont bleed anymore. Very bizzarre to me. He wants to do t his because of my bad reaction to medicines. This wont cause any bad side effects. This all doesnt worry me. What worries me is that my mother was diagnosed with Uterine cancer around my age. I am hoping that all the tests come back normal and I dont have anything serious. They took a pap smear and blood to check my blood cell levals to see if I am anemic and thyroid to make sure it is working right(I had lost 10 pounds quickly). He said I was abit dyhadrated and wants me to drink lots of water. (I hate drinking water). I just pray everything turns out ok.
As far as my GED it looks as if i will never get it taken. The program that I was in requires that i have my son join a program called headstart. A case worker would have to come out and see him three times a week for two hours and I owuld have to drive him to town twice a month. The twice a month thing doesnt bother me. Whgat bothers me is the case worker comeing to my house. I really dont want to draw attention to myself because i dont have normal heat right now. I am using a kerosene heater and I dont want them to think t his to be inappropriate and take my children from me. We were given a wood stove but I had gottne it too late in the season. I dont have any wood for it. I dont have a truck to pick up fire wood and didnt have time to cut my own. Another reason is that I have been tryng very hard to get a job. I cant work if I have to be here for the case worker. It is very frustrating. I cant get my GED paid unless i comply to this. I dont understand it but it is what it is.
The eye doctor, I dont want to go there. Boy am i mad!!! I called to get my daughter rechcked for her prescription. They said they cant see her anymore because i was a no show for three appointments. I know that is not true. I know that I did miss one appointment because it was the day after my sister passed away last year. I forgot to cancel the appointment. Who would have remember when they wnet through what I went t hrough the day before? Other than that, I have never been a no show for any appointment!! It is not like me to do that. I always call. As a matter of fact I am very picky. I even come 15 minutes before my scheduled appointment. I tried to explain to them that they must have made a mistake but she would not listen. Shge was very rude. Being that this is the only place within a 100 miles that takes my insurance, I am going to have to pay for her visit somewhere. There goes my money for my GED!! It never ends for me.
Last but least, my car is running bad. It runs worse now than it did before it went into the mechanic. I dont know what they did but it was something bad. All they did was replace the water pump and the timing belt on my car. They wont relook at it unless i pay for it. UNREAL!! I have to take it back in next month to get the other 315 dollars worth of work to it to get it inspected. I wonder what they will mess up then.
On a brighter note...I have been feeling a little less depressed. My stress level has not changed so I must be dealing with things better. I realluy would like to get a job but I have to be patient. If I get a job now my insurance will drop. I need that to get my surgery done. I just have to take one step at a time. Patience is defenetly not my virtue. lol
I am very sorry that I have not commented on people's journals. As always you are all in my thoughts and prayers. I am going to try to sit down for a couple of hours tonight and read and comment on journals. If anyone needs me for anything please feel free to e-mail me Carouselqueen70@aol.com. I try to check my e-mails everyday. Hugs to everyone.
I am going to try to take it easy today. I have very litle cleaning to do. I think i will read and try to get my mind off of things. I really would like to move closer to town eben if it means renitng again. : ( I hate the thought but going back and forth to town is getting harder and harder to do. If I am in town, the kids can do more after school activities. I think it is for the best. I may try to sell this and get a trailor in the trailor park in town. That way I can keep my pets. : ).. They allow cats and dogs. That would be nice but only a dream. I have actually been dreaming every night about moving. I am always afraid of leaving something special behind. It is a mental problem of mine. My sister was the same way but WORSE. She kept things in boxes and had a whole room full of boxes. Trying to get her to give anything away was impossible,. She would say ,"what if i need it later?? " Of course she never would. I was like that but caught myself and got rid of alot of stuff. I am still trying to find homes for some of my things.