Tuesday, September 18, 2007

New medicine

I know it has been awhile since I have posted a journal page. Alot has been going on. I have been more depressed than ever. I finally gave in and went to see the doctor. She put me on xanax for panic attacks and effexor for my depression. I guess everything really caught up with me. My youngest daughter is having problems in school. The councilor thinks there may be something wrong with her. I think she just needs to apply herself more. I dont see my husband very much anymore. He has been working 12 hour nights. He goes in at 1pm and doesnt get home until 1 am. By the time he gets home, I am bed sleeping. He doesnt get out of bed until about 11 then he has to leave to got o work at 12. I guess it is taking a toll on our marriage. I feel like I am alone when it comes to the kids. I am really lonely. I miss my husband and the way we used to be. We havent really hugged and kissed each other in a long while. The house is a total mess. I have been running the kids to doctor's appointments and sports events all week. I feel as if I need to be two people. I am the only one who goes to my son's football games and my daughter's concerts. Gees I feel all worn out.

On a brighter note, we are signing papers for our new house tomorrow. Although it will be really hard to come up with the money to pay for it, it is really something that we needed to do. The house is costing us 55,000. It is a very small house but in really good shape. We have a small yard and a very nice neighbor. We will be close to the school and walking distance to the park and the store. It will make life easier. plus most important, It has heat.

I don't know about you but I have noticed that people are acting alot diffeent than they used to. People are more judgemental and just plain out and out rude. The way people talk to each other anymore is just horrible. I had some bad experiences with people this last week. I have had people cut in front of me and not say excuse me. I have had people just have a cold attitude towards me. Sometimes I think that people in general just dont like me. Maybe it is just in my head.

Well I guess I better close this before i write a book lol



bojgill4375 said...

Wow! AOL is slow tonight or it is just my computer?? I have been feeling tired too. Seems like a lot of others have too?? Did the teacher say what might be wrong with her? Maybe she is AD, maybe have her checked with a doctor. My son needed glasses in the 2nd grade. She might be depressed too or just worried over you. When my daughter was in the first grade her teacher told me that my little girl was worried about me when she was at school. I was going through a divorce and cried a lot. My little girl worried about me.

I am glad that you are getting the new home. That might help your depression a lot since you are having many problems with the trailer that you live in now. That is an answer to prayer getting a new home. God is sooo good!  You will be closer to the school and the store and that will help you a lot. About you and your husband.. take the hour that he is up, make time. You might go to bed early and have him wake you up when he comes to bed. People are rude and it is not just you. You & your family are in my prayers, Janie

barbpinion said...

Hi hon. Sorry you're so stressed. It's understandable why. You have lots going on. I am glad you went to the doctor. I'm sure the xanax and effexor will help. It's tough not seeing much of hubby. I'd share what I could with him for that hour. It will, at least, keep you connected, and that is really important in a marriage. I know it won't be easy to do, had to do it that way once myself. But it is possible, and worth the effort. HOORAY! So glad you got the house. I was quite concerned for your family, knowing how cold it gets in winter. Take care of yourself. Pencil in time for a bubble bath - with candles and music, if possible. It will lift your spirits. It always does mine.
Barb- http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/FROMBARBSSPIRITUALJOURNALS

ljat1 said...

Hi Christine.  Thanks for visiting my journal and commenting.  Please feel free to visit and comment any time!  I'm sorry you've been depressed lately but glad that you talked to your doctor and got some meds to help you through it.  Sometimes we just need a little something extra.  We're living in such stressful times.  Just remember, this too shall pass!!  Congratulations on getting a new house.  I'm sure you're all excited.  What an adventure.  I know how tough it is when you and your husband are on opposite sides of the clock.  Hopefully, it won't have to be that way for long.  As for rude people or thinking that it has to do with you, I think people are just so wrapped up in their own problems that they have forgotten simple common courtesies.  That and so many youngsters aren't being taught any manners, but that's another story!  And I guess I better close this one before I write a book, too!!  Blessings to you.  Linda