I know it has been awhile since I have posted a journal page. Alot has been going on. I have been more depressed than ever. I finally gave in and went to see the doctor. She put me on xanax for panic attacks and effexor for my depression. I guess everything really caught up with me. My youngest daughter is having problems in school. The councilor thinks there may be something wrong with her. I think she just needs to apply herself more. I dont see my husband very much anymore. He has been working 12 hour nights. He goes in at 1pm and doesnt get home until 1 am. By the time he gets home, I am bed sleeping. He doesnt get out of bed until about 11 then he has to leave to got o work at 12. I guess it is taking a toll on our marriage. I feel like I am alone when it comes to the kids. I am really lonely. I miss my husband and the way we used to be. We havent really hugged and kissed each other in a long while. The house is a total mess. I have been running the kids to doctor's appointments and sports events all week. I feel as if I need to be two people. I am the only one who goes to my son's football games and my daughter's concerts. Gees I feel all worn out.
On a brighter note, we are signing papers for our new house tomorrow. Although it will be really hard to come up with the money to pay for it, it is really something that we needed to do. The house is costing us 55,000. It is a very small house but in really good shape. We have a small yard and a very nice neighbor. We will be close to the school and walking distance to the park and the store. It will make life easier. plus most important, It has heat.
I don't know about you but I have noticed that people are acting alot diffeent than they used to. People are more judgemental and just plain out and out rude. The way people talk to each other anymore is just horrible. I had some bad experiences with people this last week. I have had people cut in front of me and not say excuse me. I have had people just have a cold attitude towards me. Sometimes I think that people in general just dont like me. Maybe it is just in my head.
Well I guess I better close this before i write a book lol