Thursday, August 14, 2008

trials and errors of my son

 

I am at my wits end. My hair is is going to all come out. Gees I dont know if I can take much more of of this teenage stuff. I found a penthouse magazine in his room. I dont even know where he got that!! We dont have anything like that here. I was online just now reading my e-mails and some girl actually instant messages me on myspace messenger and says" Hi Bitch!" talking to my son. I guess she didnt know the CJ was at football practice today. Gees, How did my mother do it? I wasnt even this bad of a teenager. These kids are really out of control!! Do you see the way these girls dress these days!! I have two more kids to go through the teenager years with. I dont know if i have the energy!

Thank you for all the advice. It really was helpful. I have never been through this before. I have a 19 year old daughter but I didnt really have this much problems with her. I had to reprimand her for her clothing choices and i worried about her and her boyfriend making a mistake but she wasnt out of control like this." What did I do wrong? "That is what I keep asking myself. I am going to take the advice about limited phone use and having to work for extra time on the computer and phone. I am also going to turn my phone off at night.  They call him at 3 or 4 in the morning. It wakes me up and i have a hard time falling asleep as it is.I am going to try to wriote him a well thought out letter. I dont want to make him hate me. I dont want him to be upset or sad. I grew up in a home where I didnt get much attention or love. I want to be there for him. I want him to feel as if he can talk to me about everything. I want our good relationship back.  I pray  that I can stay strong and do what I have to do to get this striaght. I want him to have friends and girlfriends. I just dont want him to forget what is important (his schooling and his football) I know he really loves both. He qas an "A" student last year. He loves to play football. He is so proud of himself with that. I pray that he doesnt slip this year. I want to see him succeed in life and everything he does. I want him to live better than I have.  

Thank you all for being there for me and all the great advice. I dont know what I would do without my J-land friends.

Keeping everyone in my prayers

 

8 comments:

shrbrisc said...

Honey I know you are upset but it is normal for boys to have those things not acceptable to parents oviously but he is normal and you will get thru this I promise been there and done that.
hugs
Sherry

fieldpixie272 said...

well it is definitely normal for teens to push their limits.  You will make it through the teen years just fine because you love your son, and you just have to love him through all the stuff!

salemslot9 said...

I'm sure you got
rid of that magazine
which is the right thing to do
but, my advise is
don't make him feel guilty
like he did something really wrong
it might give him low self esteem
and try not to get yourself
too worked up
not good for your health
p.s.
maybe dad can say a few words to him
about those magazines being
disrespectful to women...

salemslot9 said...

advice*

csandhollow said...

I would not worry too much about the magazine. BUT maybe it is time for an advanced sex talk. NOt the birds and bees but relationships and what is expected and respect for bodies.

bojgill4375 said...

My daughter has had to talk to my grandson. The girls chase the boys this day of age. Something else. She has grounded him from the phone and the computer. Hate to mention this but children are paying child support now through their parents. Might tell him that?? My uncle was 16 when his son was born. He was going with an older girl. I am thankful that I don't have any teenagers right now. It is hard for them this day of age. Sex is thought of as nothing anymore. Sad. I will be keeping all of you in my prayers. Hugs, Janie

dbdacoba said...

Hi Christine.  Don't worry about the magazine.  I would worry a little bit about predatory girl friends, but a good solid, loving discussion about sex and responsibilities is in order.  Tough times come, especially if one is a teenager. but a good adult's perspective is vital to prepare him before life slaps him in the face.  By all means brown out the phone so you don't get awakened in the middle of the night.  Whatever it is with this girl, it will probably pass.  It sounds too intense to be serious.
                                                                      Love,
                                                                        DB

lsfp1960 said...

Hi there Christine,  I remember when my son was about 14, I found the "bra & panties" section of the Sears Catalog under his mattress.  I think it's a normal thing for curious teenagers (especially boys).  The main thing is to keep open the line of communication with him.  Let him know that he can always come to you with questions in that area.  And it's time to have the talk about pregnancy, etc (if you haven't already).  I tried to scare the daylights out of my son~"if you get a girl pg you will pay child support for at least 18 years, whether you ever see the child or not."  He's 37 years old now & was married briefly but has not fathered a child. (Thank you God!)  The main thing is that open line of communication~be sure he knows he can come to you at anytime with any question. And never stop reminding him, how much you love him.  All the experts say to limit phone & computer time for teenagers too.  And the computer should be in a room where you are.  Computers in teenagers bedrooms are bad news!  You are his mom & you have the right to know what he's doing & who he's talking to.  Linda in Washington state