I am just not feeling well emotionally today. I didnt get out of bed until 12:30. I just didnt feel there was any reason why I should even attempt it. Everytime I try to make things work, i get kicked down a few notches. Everyday I wake up and think to myself "What horrible thing is going to happen today?" I feel like prey for the wolves. I am so weak right now that I get taken advantage of. I went down to the electric compnay yesterday to pay on my bill. I am so nervous because i didnt have the full amount. I didnt know if hey would shut me off or not. They didnt but I have a week to pay on it or they will. I owe another 150 dollars. That was just for last month.I am only 10 days late on paying it. I will have the money next week. But I am so scared i wont the next month. They had a list there with 12 names for shut off. They know this county is gong under yet they have no sympathy for people who are struggling. I could never be like that. I guess that makes me weak. I dont know. All I do anymore is worry, worry, worry. My stomach is sick. My body feels worn out and tired. Sometimes I dont know if these are my real feelings or feelings that come from my depression. I was finally diagnosed with Unipolar depression and fibromalgyia. I knew I had fibro but didnt know that my depression had a title. I am trying to battle with that while I am trying to keep things going here. My kids and pets come first. If it werent for them I wouldnt care what happened to me. Every decision I make is for them. Sorry if my journal entry has depressed anyone. I just write how I feel even if it isnt optimistic. Thank you for listening.